Memory Tree in Gunnison helps families cope with grief over losses in 2021

ByMarcy Curtis

GUNNISON – A night to remember loved ones who have passed on was held on Tuesday, Nov. 30 at the Gunnison Home and Hospice center. A special tree located out front of the office was decorated with ornaments in honor of those lost.

“We invite all our bereaved families and anyone in the community who has lost someone to come and place an ornament in memory of their loved one,” ShanaLee Mellor, nurse clinical manager with Gunnison Hospice, said.

“Hospice Adds Life to Days When You Can’t Add Days to Life.” November was National Hospice and Home Health Month. Gunnison Valley Hospital’s hospice team is skilled, knowledgeable, compassionate, and amazing at what they do. Hospice is the best care when a cure is not possible. (left) Julie Jeffrey, social work/CAN; Teri Levitt, Wayne Hospice case manager; ShanaLee Mellor, nurse clinical coordinator; Pat Sehorn, hospice nurse; Stephanie, hospice nurse; Kambree Wright, hospice case manager; Carl Cox, social work/spiritual leader; and Lacy Stockton, hospice case manager.

Observing or placing ornaments can be done anytime throughout the Christmas season. There are ornaments at the hospice office that can be made specifically for your loved one, or you can bring your own. Mellor said that this is the first year they have done the memory tree, and they are hoping to make it an annual event.

“We placed some special ornaments on the tree this year,” Mellor said. “One in remembrance of all our hospice patients that have passed away and then a couple in memory of some of the doctors we worked with that recently passed away, Dr. Inouye and Dr. Christensen.”

Carl Cox, counselor at Gunnison Valley Hospital, spoke with attendees about grieving especially during the holiday season.

The winter holidays are generally perceived as “the most wonderful time of the year.” But for those who are facing grief after the death of a loved one, the holidays may instead be a time filled with pain and sadness. 

“Even those for whom grief is not as fresh, the holidays may serve as an annual reminder of the loss,” he said. “Not only of that person, but of tradition and celebration.”

Bereavement professionals working in hospice and palliative care understand how difficult this season can be. They support families coping with loss all year long. Bereavement counselors stress the importance of making decisions that feel right to the grieving person and giving oneself permission to make new or different choices at the holidays. 

Holidays often center on certain traditions and rituals. For some, continuing these traditions without a loved one may be an important way to continue sharing their memory. For others, it may be more comforting to develop new rituals to help lessen the pain and immediacy of the loss.

A Christmas tree has been placed out in front of the hospice center for bereaved families to hang ornaments on in memory of loved ones.

 While the holidays can be filled with meaning, they can also be filled with pressure and stress because of additional tasks such as shopping, baking and decorating. Grieving people should be encouraged to prioritize what needs to be done and focus on those projects that may bring them pleasure. Perhaps the gift list can be pared down, cards need not be sent out, or another family member can cook the family dinner this year.

The holidays can bring opportunities to remember the person who has died in a way that is personally meaningful. The Gunnison Valley Hospice Memory Tree can be a way for families to remember their loved one during the holidays. Others may choose to share special family stories over a meal. Some may find that donating to a special charity or volunteering time to help others in need may be a comforting way to honor their loved one.

“The hospice team is made up of highly trained, competent, compassionate staff, who love the work that they do,” Mellor said.

Hospice provides comfort care with staff trained specifically in pain and symptom management control.  Hospice can provide medications, necessary supplies, and durable medical equipment related to a patient’s terminal illness.  Hospice also provides counseling, support and spiritual support by a social work and spiritual leader.  

Something Mellor said they are also focusing more on is the needs of their bereaved families and community members with grief. The last year has added additional need for grief and bereavement support, and they want to assist the community with that.

On Dec. 7 at the Gunnison Hospice Office, 45 E 100 N, they resumed their Bereavement Support Group.  The group is for bereaved family members or for anyone in the community dealing with grief. The support group will be held the first Tuesday of every month at 6 p.m.

“Come learn about what grief is, tips on handling grief, and be supported by our bereavement counselors and others going through the grieving process,” Mellor said.